J.Lo’s Neighbor From the Block Selling House

J.Lo, oh, excuse me being that I’ve just committed the unthinkable…rather…Yeni’s divorce attorney neighbor in the richy rich NY suburb Brookville has put up his house for sale.

What could have prompted this sale offer? Surely, Yeni has sound-proof walls and her querido neighbors cannot hear all her post-partum whining and her bratty twins.

Maybe the paparazzi can have a money pool and purchase the house with the resulting funds. Then they can photog J.Lo in all seasons, and from all angles. They won’t need 20K lens to get a close-up, then Hee, hee. Want to get a view of Yeni’s casa?

Twins Turn J.Lo into a Germ Freak

How motherhood has changed Yeni. I mean, besides, those extra butts she no doubt has now. She’s turned into a germ freak:

Yeni imposed a ban on flowers and gifts entering in the babies’ nursery, because she wants to keep it squeaky clean. Guests coming to see Emme and Max had to use surgery masks and apply antiseptic lotion prior to handling the bebes and entering their nurseries. And that ain’t all of it.  A source told the press:

“She is also paranoid about hygiene. The twins’ wing is totally sterile and all flowers and presents are stored in a separate area so they don’t contaminate the babies’ area. It may sound excessive but she only has her kids’ best interests at heart and wants to give them the start in life she never had.”[Source]

Ninos Ricachones

Wonder how life is for Yeni’s twins? Wonder, not.  

 

They’ve got the complete baby spoiling deluxe package, including a masseuse to massage Max’s little bones into gear, and Emme’s toosh to look like her mother’s in matter of years:

“Jennifer has gone all-out to give the twins an amazing childhood. She hired a colour therapist to paint the nursery a beautiful aquamarine and light blue – colours which are supposed to have intelligence-boosting properties. She listened to classical music all through her pregnancy and is now having music piped through to the nursery to help relax the babies. She has hired a professional baby masseuse to come in once or twice a week.” 

With their million dollar baby trousseau, I wasn’t expecting Baby Emme and Baby Max to be treated like pobres, but goodness, isn’t Yeni’s baby pampering careening out of control?

[Source]

Dayanara Torres Writting a Book

Former Miss Universe and la ex mujer de Marc Anthony Dayanara Torres is writing a book, scheduled to be released this summer.

“Es un libro precioso, espiritual, sobre cómo sobrellevar un divorcio con gracia, y haciendo un compromiso contigo misma. Dayanara lo escribió con su hermana, quien es consejera de salud mental”

It’s a wonderful book, spiritual, about how to deal with divorce  with grace, and coming to terms with your own self.

Don’t expect any great tidbits about J.Lo and Marc curiously titled Married to Me: How committing to Myself Led To Triumph After Divorce. According to Dayanara’s camp, the book is not an autobiography, but a self-help book.

Aw come on, Dayanara. A little bit of juice, please. No sordid revelations, even with that deceptive book title? How’d she ever get that book deal without releasing a little bit of about Marky?

Salma on New Mom J.Lo

Ever wondered what Salma Hayek thinks of new mom Jennifer Lopez?

The actress, approached by US Magazine at de Grisogono’s Hollywood Domino event at the Beverly Hills Hotel told the magazine:

“I wish them the best.  They will do great.”

Wonder if Salma will share her breast-feeding and post-partum weight loss secrets with Yeni?

Welcome Emme and Max

So Yeni and Marky decided to name their newborns Emme and Max  the English equivalents of Emmelina and Maximiano.  

ChrissyAgui also named her son Max, leaving the imagination running all salvaje with one question: did Yeni and ChrissyAgui buy the same baby naming book?

[Source]

Jennifer Lopez Home with her Twins

Yeni is at home along with those twins with the on-the-hush names, says her OB/Gyn.

Yeni’s friend and producer Elaine Goldsmith-Thomas buzzed over the bliss that La Lopez and the contentment Skeletor papi are enjoying lately:

“She and Marc are so ready for a family. They love each other so much and built this beautiful life together. It feels like the only thing missing were these children, and now they have them. She really enjoyed her pregnancy.”

But child rearing will be left to the nanna. La Lopez is supposed to be filming her new movie Love and Other Possible Pursuits later on this year.

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Jennifer Lopez Gives Birth to Twins

Congratulations to Yeni and Marky. They are parents to a boy and girl born this morning in a Long Island Hospital. Names haven’t leaked yet. But I wager, one will be a Marc Anthony, Jr., and the other (the girl) will have the surname of some Lopez relative.

 

You’re a nobody, til you give birth. Go J.Lo. Having those extra booties and inflated mammaries will all be worth it.

[Source]

Baby Dearests in the Making

What about Yeni’s babies? As she’s readying to give birth, I’ve been examining the damage. A $6 million dollar deal for their pics. Thousands of dollars spent on their nurseries. What will Yeni do for an encore? These spoiled brats aren’t even born and they’re having money thrown to them and at them.

I think we can look forward to the consequences in years to come. Think when these ninos grow up instant gratification will be the norm for them. Gird up your loins Yeni.

Billboard Latin Award Nominees Are In!

Cuban drum roll please…Billboard Latin nominations have been announced.

Yeni received a nod for her album “Como Ama Una Mujer”. About time Mrs. Marc Anthony got herself some sort of industry validation for that album.  Wisin y Yandel copped noms as well. As if they needed any more reasons to get full of themselves. The Miami Herald had listings in other categories:

Hot Latin Song of The Year: Mi corazoncito — Aventura; No te veo — Casa De Leones; Dimelo — Enrique Iglesias; Me enamora — Juanes [No more drama for Juanes and more awards!]

Latin Album Of The Year (New Category): Todo cambio — Camila; El cartel: The Big Boss — Daddy Yankee; Como ama una mujer – Jennifer Lopez; Wisin vs. Yandel: Los extraterrestres — Wisin & Yandel

Latin Pop Album of the Year, Male: Quién dijo ayer — Ricardo Arjona; Papito — Miguel Bose; Viento a favor — Alejandro Fernández; La vida . . . es un ratico — Juanes [ooh, Juanes again. Congrats compadre!]

Tropical Album Of The Year,

Duo Or Group: Kings Of Bachata: Sold Out At Madison Square

Garden — Aventura; La llave de mi corazón — Juan Luis Guerra Y 440; [Juan Luis Guerra again! Oh, well good for this papacito; Los 4 fantasticos — Karis; United We Swing – Spanish Harlem Orchestra

Could Camila supplant RBD in the music biz? All they have to do is get a girl or two to join.

Congrats to all.

A Jennifer Lopez Sighting!

Where’s Yeni? There’s Yeni! She was accompanied by Markitos at last night’s Madonna-hosted and Gucci-sponsored UNICEF benefit for Malawi.

  

Could this be her last public appearance before she gives birth to Marcia and Jeno?

[Main pic: via CL; others WireImage]

Out of the Mouth of the Padre

Jennifer Lopez’s dad David let the chihuahua out of the duffel bag, revealing to Escandalo TV that his daughter and Marc Anthony are indeed expecting twins. The abuelo gushed out to the entertainment show:

“The thing is in my family, my sister also had twins, so it’s a hereditary thing. I’m very proud. Jennifer has yearned to be a mother for many years.”

Abuelo Lopez, not suprisingly, looks forward to grandpaping J.Lo’s gemelos and is already quite protective, adding:

 ”In Puerto Rico it’s custom to buy an azabache bracelet for babies to protect them from the evil eye, it’s part of our culture.”

 We don’t need any better confirmation than this. Thanks, abuelito.

[Source]

Jennifer Lopezisms

While waiting for those twins to pop out, why don’t we benefit from a little bit of Jennifer Lopez wisdom. While promoting her newest perfume Deseo to the British press, Yeni had a few interesting things to share:  

“People ask me, ‘Do you think you can have it all?’ and you know what? “I am like, ‘I don’t know, I would like to think so. We will have to wait and see. I think as a person you have to be true to yourself – nobody can tell you what is right for you.”

In this sexist mundo, women can’t win it all. Yeni’s perspective:  

“I think the problem for women is that we are used to pleasing people, and always wanting for everybody to be happy around us, and sometimes we forget about ourselves. It’s important sometimes to think, ‘I know what’s good for me’.”

The columnist who interviewed Yeni felt she was a little colder than usual, but J.Lo’s next words seem to explain it all: 

“I am at the beginning of a huge change. I think everyone is constantly changing and evolving, new things are becoming important in our lives all the time – and never more so than for me now. The whole growing-up thing, maturing…it’s difficult, but everyone has to do it.”

Yes, Yeni do your thing.  

Shakira, Christina, and Mariah Got Mucho Lanita

 

Shakira, Christina Aguilera, and Mariah Carey have yet another thing in common. They’re the only three Latinas to make Forbes magazine’s list of highest grossing female musical artists for the fiscal year of 2007.

 

Is Jennifer Lopez About to Deliver Those Twins?

She’s at Northshore Hospital, according to Newsday, as I’m typing this. Could  Skeletor’s spawn be going through that canal right about now?

Jennifer Lopez’s Bordertown on DVD

 

A scene from the Jennifer Lopez, Gregory Nava-directed film Bordertown, out on DVD today. The film also stars Antonio Banderas. This movie will be our only movie look at Yeni for some time. Unless a script comes up for the role of a wealthy and pregnant Latina, with a spoiled fetus, a Skeletor for a husband.

[Source]

Eva Longoria Baby Bump Shopping

Eva Longoria was caught buying baby clothes. No, they’re not for her, but for her amijita Jennifer Lopez. As if Yeni needed any more baby stuff.

 

Speaking about her own eventual plans for motherhood with husband Tony Parker, E.Lo told the British press:

“We’re so happy if we get pregnant, and if we don’t, we’re okay.  We’re just letting God decide it.”
In the meantime, guess she’s getting some good training in baby clothes shopping.

[Source]

The Latina Preggers Club: Inaugural Meeting

The Latina Preggers Club is now in session and is abuzzing.

 

Club treasurer Jennifer Lopez is worried sick about pregnancy weight gain. Club President Salma Hayek hooks her mamalas to a breast-feeding pump, even when she’s not breastfeeding. It’ll help her lose weight…she thinks. And now…now junior member Jessica Alba…wait…let’s hear it from the lady herself:

“breastfeeding … is the only thing I’m paranoid about. More than giving birth.”

So what excatly are you afraid of Jessy? That little Junior Warren is gonna suck those teetays right off your chest? Or worse yet, that they’ll sag. Hee, hee. Then you’ll have to slid right off those Maxim and AskMen.com countdowns, huh?

[Source via US]

Salma’s Secret Post-Partum Diet

After being told by her more experienced friends in motherhood that breast feeding your baby helps you lose pregnancy weight, Salma Hayek is trying to lose all the pounds she gained while pregnant with Valentina in a quite an unusual, ahem, way. A friend let the chihuahua out of the bag on Salma’s diet:

“Salma has been pumping and freezing endless amounts of breast milk. When she’s not feeding Valentina, she’s hooked up to an industrial-size breast pump.”

Some friend.

Unfortunately despite Salmaita’s best efforts, the pregnancy weight seems to remain. Pobre, Salma. Susan Condon, a breastfeeding expert has some advice for Salmaita, though:

“After you have your baby, if what you eat is varied and well balanced, breastfeeding can help you lose your pregnancy weight without compromising either your health or your baby’s by dieting. And you naturally burn calories to make breast milk every time you nurse. The best way [to] losing weight is to work toward a gradual weight loss, eat when you’re hungry, and make sure you get enough fluids. It’s the best way of losing weight easily and safely!”

Salmaita, I will give you the same advice I gave Jennifer. Don’t worry about that pregnancy weight. There’s just more of you to love, that’s all, comadre. And those size 6 designer gowns…send them my way. I will gladly dispose of them for you.

[Source]

Baby Shower for Jennifer Lopez

Yeni had a baby shower over the weekend at the exclusive Park Hotel in New York City. The blue and pink theme makes her a mother-of-twins suspect. Word is, the shower took place on the hotel’s rooftop. Wonder if Marky hauled her off on a wheelchair to the elevator. Or did she walk up those long flight of stairs and got some mommy exercise?

[Source]

Pic: Showbiz Spy

Jennifer Lopez in Cosmo

Marc is changing Yeni. Not the way around. In the UK edition of Cosmopolitan Yeni lets it out.

 “What I know is that after I married Marc, I wanted to take stock of my life and make my marriage work. ‘J Lo the diva’ made a conscious effort to become ‘Jennifer the wife’.”

Could there be some truth to the claims that celebrity manager Irving Azoff dumped J.Lo because her hubby Marc Anthony was constantly butting in, in career decisions? What do I get the feeling that after this chica drops that baby, she’s going to be a whole different person, and I’m not talking about the three extra butts she’ll have in post-pregnancy baby weight.

[Source]

Grammys Face Cancellation

If the Grammys end up getting the Golden Globe treatment because of the writer’s strike, the winners at this year’s Grammys will not get to walk across the stage in all their Grammy-winning glory come this February 10th. Here are the Latinos who are nominated this year’s awards:

In the Best Latin Rock Or Alternative Album we have No Hay Espacio by Black: Guayaba; Adelantando by Jarabe De Palo; Amantes Sunt Amentes by Panda; Kamikaze by Rabanes; and Memo Rex Commander Y El Corazón Atómico De La Via Láctea by Zoé.

In the Best Latin Urban Album category, nominations went to E.S.L. by Akwid; El Abayarde Contra-Ataca by Tego Calderón; Residente O Visitante by Calle 13; El Cartel: The Big Boss by Daddy Yankee; and Vacaneria! by Fulanito. And of course Mike Elizondo was nominated for Producer of the Year.

Too bad J.Lo’s album “Como Ama Una Mujer” did not figure in any of these categories. It was released in time to be eligible. She’s done some of her best vocal work on this album.

[Source]

pics: Batanga

Is Jennifer Lopez the Dumped or the Dumpee

Did Jennifer Lopez fired her manager Irving Azoff? Or was it the other way around? It all depends on whose publicist you believe.

The Jennifer Lopez side: Yeni parted ways with the manager.

The Irving Azoff side: During a heated phone call with J-Lo, Azoff told Yeni that she made it impossible for her to be managed and that he didn’t appreciate Marc Anthony’s undesirable advice and meddling. He then send her off her dumping letter.

Scotland Yard, we need your help on this one.

[Source]

Mariah Carey: I Never Dissed J.Lo

Mariah Carey says that reports that she referred to Jennifer Lopez as “a pig” is so untrue.

“This is just some internet gossip and it’s pathetic that people actually entertain the thought that this could be real. This is another sad example of two strong women being pit against each other.”

So the pig part wasn’t true, diva…can we still hope for a duet? [Source]

Jennifer Lopez in Harper’s Bazaar

Look who’s on the cover of the newest Harper’s Bazaar. None other than my best friend Yeni.

Yeni is all drama inside the magazine’s covers.

Commenting on her recent preggers-on-the-hush-hush: “I kind of feel like everybody knew anyway. I was on tour with a bubble gut!”

Of her skeletor marido Mark Anthony she said:

“He made me realize you can be an artist, and have credibility and success, without your life being on public display 24 hours a day.”

And looks like once she gets her bun out of the oven, she’s gonna get extra private:

“I’m just feeling too protective to open that door right now. It’s a Pandora’s box. It’s a destructive lifestyle to be out there. I know because I’ve lived it. Being on the cover of the tabloids every day for two years – it’s hard. You start forgetting who you really are inside.”

She looks good, though. Got to admit it.

[Source]

Mariah Carey Says Hell No to Jennifer Lopez Duet

At some point, your overworking brain has probably thought about how great it would be if Mariah Carey and Jennifer Lopez, two great Latinas would do a song together. File this fantasy under ‘Dream On’, ’cause it ain’t gonna happen. When asked about the possibility, Mariah, while being interviewed by “Inside Hollywood”, The Riah said:

 

“I’d rather be on stage with a pig! A duet with Jennifer Lopez and me just isn’t going to happen.”

Ouch. Sounds like a little bit of resentment to me. Yeni doesn’t have half of the pipes, but she gets as much fame and attention. This must be getting on Mariah’s nerves.

According to a source, this rivalry goes waaay back, when J.Lo sampled two of the songs that would eventually be on soundtrack to Mariah’s soundrack to her movie Glitter.

“Mariah was so paranoid about the music getting out that we had another singer sing the temporary versions before the film was released.”

We all know the rest of the story. Glitter tanked, and J.Lo’s album blew up. But surely, there’s enough room for everyone.

Jennifer Lopez’s sonogram is in: it’s a boy, and a girl

While it was no secret that Jennifer Lopez is expecting twins, the sex of the Marc Anthony and Yeni babies have been a mystery. Until now. JLo recently got a sonogram, and it revealed that that it’s gonna be a boy and a girl. The singer has had monogrammed Princess and Prince at celeb baby bump haven Petit Tresor. Wonder what their names will be..

JLo has also admitted in an interview that her preggers status has turned her into a big cry baby:

“Anything that is touching makes me cry – any commercial that is sappy and silly. Things about dads make me cry, maybe because of my relationship with my own father. But anytime I see anything about a dad with his little girl, and I’m over tired, I’m gone!”

[Source]
Pic: Splash News

Jennifer Lopez’s Pregnancy Fat Phobia

                                                         

Guess Yeni thought that her bootilicious self would be exempt from pregnancy weight gain. That is so not the case. A source told an Indian newspaper that:

“She is huge and freaking out. She has already put on more than 42lbs and isn’t that far gone. Her face has become really puffy from retaining a lot of water. She plans to do a Victoria Beckham now and hibernate for the last few months. You won’t be seeing much of her in public from now on.”

Don’t worry Yeni. There’ll just be more of your for Marky to love, that’s all.
 [Source]

Jessica Alba…Preggers!

Hear ye, hear ye…check out this announcement from Jessica Alba’s publicist Steve Carafelli: “I can confirm that Jessica and Cash are expecting a baby in late spring, early summer.” Cash…as in Cash Warren, the director’s assistant she met on the set of the Transformers movie, that she’s been dating for quite a while in Hollywood minutes. For you men out there who think you’ll be missing those abs…don’t worry. Comadre ain’t your girlfriend, or your wife; she’s got a personal trainer. So, with ChrissyAgui, Yeni and now Jessica pregnant, wonder if they’ll form a Pregnant Latina Club?

Christina Aguilera in Marie Claire mag

Christina Aguilera is expecting and wants the whole world to know that she’s proud of her new curves. You’re a liberated mujer ChrissyAgui. We know that from your Dirty video. But did you have to pose for those Playboy-like poses in the January issue of Marie Claire?

Jennifer Lopez’s Baby Bump

Look at that motherhood glow. That’s Yeni and Marco Antonio at the Kodak Theater over the weekend. What a cute couple they make. Looks like the twins are growing healthy. Wonder what J.Lo’s butt will look like post-partum?

Mariah Carey’s very own perfume

Mariah Carey has now joined the ranks of singers like Jennifer Lopez who have their own perfumes. The singer at Macy’s Glendale yesterday, promoting her new scent called simply M.

 

We’re surprised that Butterflew Carey didn’t call it Butterfly or Catterpillar or something. Fear not, though, the perfume’s cap is shaped beautifully like a butterfly. Would love to try it out. According to her, the fragrance’s combination consists of dash of Moroccan incnense, a hint of Living Tahitian Tiare, and some chewy marshmallows.

Jennifer Lopez’s “Como Ama Una Mujer”

What do you do when you’re mostly known for your assets (gluteus maximus to be exact),  a steadying singing career (aerobic dance moves included),  celebpreneurship ventures (a perfume, a restaurant, a clothing line) and you put your heart and soul out into an all-Spanish album Como Ama Una Mujer that’s slept on by the mainstream? You recycle it into a telenovela, that’s what. Thus was born Jennifer Lopez’s latest venture, her own mini-series on Univision “Como Ama Una Mujer” starring la Mexicana Rebecca Jones (La Vida en El Espejo, Huracan, Passions), Chile’s Cristian de la Fuente (CSI Miami, Soñar no Cuesta Nada, Eve) and Leonor Varela (Arrested Development). Univision has been promoted the series like crazy, even deceptively (or rather, strategically) placing Yeni in the promotional blitz. Many who tuned in were actually under the impression that J.Lo would be starring in it (see the promotional above below). Lots of viewership tune-in for the first episode. Gotta hand it to her. That chica is smart.

JLo’s Pregnancy Confession (Finalmente)

Following the lead of ChrissyAgui who recently confessed her own pregnancy, Yeni Lopez finally fessed up to being preggo. Last night during the Miami Stop of her El Cantante Tour with husband Marc Antony the singer-actress tattletold, “. “Marc and I are expecting a baby!” The truth will set you free, Yeni.

[Photocredit: WireImage and Rodrigo and Luis Guerra Jr/Jr Ramey via People.com]

Record Label: Jennifer Lopez is a Primadonna

As much as we try to keep the Yeni posts to a minimum, this chica keeps popping up. She’s on our radar now because of her high-maintainance regimen. She’s reportedly making her record label Epic Records spend more money on her, than they’re making from her albums. Rumors are, they’re planning to drop her! Consider these, compradres and comadres:

 Last Album Cover: $60,000 (in hair and makeup, lighting, photog, etc)

 Music Video Budget:  $300,000

Sales of latest album Brave? 53,000 copies. 

Epic apparently forgot the days when the On the Six and J.Lo albums were making money for their pockets. You’re only as good as your last album (sigh).

Rosie Perez Discovered Yeni. yokay?

What’s all the fuss all about? After telling Michael Musto in an interview in Out Magazine that she’s responsible for discovering Jennifer Lopez, dancer-choreographer Rosie Perez was met with a lot of rolling ojos.  Perez told the magazine that she insisted that a chubby checker Lopez come on board as a dancer on the 1990s sketch show In Living Color—despite the fact that Keenan Ivory Wayans, the producer of In Living Color objected.

 Credit should be given where credit is due. Ms. Perez, while not responsible for making Jennifer Lopez a star, was definitely instrumental in the making of Yeni.

Is “Yeni” Lopez Seriously Aging?

Is Yeni “I’m not pregnant with twins” Lopez aging faster than she should be? Check out these pics from an Allure photo shoot…