Aliette Vazquez Dumps DWTS Boyfriend

(Above: Helio and Ali in happier times.)  

Dacing with the Stars winner Helio Castroneves may have outdanced-danced finalists Melanie “Scary Spice” Brown and Marie Osmond on the show and he may be quite fast on his two feet and on his wheels as a car racing star. But, unfortunately, not fast enough in the romantic arena. His girlfriend Aliette Vasquez got to dump him first. She cancelled their engagement, for reasons we’re sure has nothing to do with another galan!  ”We had the engagement off for one or two weeks,” Helio told Access Hollywood. “It’s a shame. … I’m sure we’re going to be friends.” Whatever, Helio. You’re following Mario Lopez, aren’t you? Cheating on your girl, with your 19-year old DWTS partner? Ali, querida, take heart. You’ll find someone in your business circle.

Angie Martinez’s Fashion and Beauty Show

She’s a deejay…a recording artist. Now, she’s a fashion and beauty mogul. That’s my girl Puerto Rican diva Angie Martinez, at the first edition of her self-named beauty and fashion expo. I’m really liking her highlights, but that outfit was sooo inappropriate for a fashion show. Angie, you’re preaching beauty and hair to the world, but you could you have used some lessons yourself? Oh, well, at least she got to pimp Cover Girl for sponsorship. You go, Angie. (That’s Mama Martinez next to her…aww).

 [photo credit: Clutch Magazine]

Eva Mendes’s Soft Porn Endorsement

Who better to sell us some high class booze? None other than Eva Mendes. Mendes will be part of an ad campaign for the alcoholic beverage Campari, which includes a calendar with beefy, Harlequinesque featuring photos like the one above. Suprisingly, the calendar has her reenacting scenes from children’s fairy tales like Little Red Riding Hood and Pinocchio. How irresponsible of Ms. Mendes. I’m not gonna come between her and her livelihood but dios mio, couldn’t she try to endorse face creams like Paola Rey. When statistics are showing an increase of alcohol abuse among minorities, especially Latinos, couldn’t Senorita Mendes do some public service announcements instead. But I guess peddling soft porn with alcohol in the background is more ideal. Oh, Eva, Eva.

Salma Hayek and Child

Oh, look. It’s Salma Hayek and her baby girl Valentina Paloma Pinault. What a fine picture they make. Looks like Salmita’s hijita got her looks from her father.

Puerto Rican Pageant Officials Investigate

Whoever peppersprayed Miss Puerto Rico Universe 2007 beauty pageant’s eventual winner Ingrid Marie Rivera…you (or you all) are in big trouble.

 

The pageant’s officials vow to uncover the culprit(s) who stole and subsequently peppersprayed the Puerto Rican beauty’s clothes and makeup causing her to break out in hives. Word is because Ms. Rivera has been a favorite in other pageants, and the Puerto Rican press had been all over the place, predicting her as the winner, the haters felt that they had to act. Pageantry is such a vicious, and ruthless industry with vultures and hyenas and gatas salvajes involved, but still, it’s sad that there are haters at this level. [photo credit: Reuters]

Lupe Ontiveros in New Movie

I hate Christmas and moreso Christmas films. To me La Navidad is way to much exploited by the commercial world.  Jesus is the excuse for the season. Alright, enough ranting…Look out for Lupe Ontiveros (Maya and Miguel, “Una Vez Al Ano Para Toda Una Vida”, As Good As it Gets, “Desperate Housewives”) in the holiday film This Christmas. While some in the Latino community have said that she plays way too many maids, and she herself has been adamant not to be pigeonholed into Mexican maid roles, there’s no denying that like other underdogs playing servitude roles, she brings stately dignity to the screen. Am I the only one who’s still feeling her as Carmen in Real Women Have Curves opposite George Lopez and America Ferrera?

Mariah Carey’s very own perfume

Mariah Carey has now joined the ranks of singers like Jennifer Lopez who have their own perfumes. The singer at Macy’s Glendale yesterday, promoting her new scent called simply M.

 

We’re surprised that Butterflew Carey didn’t call it Butterfly or Catterpillar or something. Fear not, though, the perfume’s cap is shaped beautifully like a butterfly. Would love to try it out. According to her, the fragrance’s combination consists of dash of Moroccan incnense, a hint of Living Tahitian Tiare, and some chewy marshmallows.

Jennifer Lopez’s “Como Ama Una Mujer”

What do you do when you’re mostly known for your assets (gluteus maximus to be exact),  a steadying singing career (aerobic dance moves included),  celebpreneurship ventures (a perfume, a restaurant, a clothing line) and you put your heart and soul out into an all-Spanish album Como Ama Una Mujer that’s slept on by the mainstream? You recycle it into a telenovela, that’s what. Thus was born Jennifer Lopez’s latest venture, her own mini-series on Univision “Como Ama Una Mujer” starring la Mexicana Rebecca Jones (La Vida en El Espejo, Huracan, Passions), Chile’s Cristian de la Fuente (CSI Miami, Soñar no Cuesta Nada, Eve) and Leonor Varela (Arrested Development). Univision has been promoted the series like crazy, even deceptively (or rather, strategically) placing Yeni in the promotional blitz. Many who tuned in were actually under the impression that J.Lo would be starring in it (see the promotional above below). Lots of viewership tune-in for the first episode. Gotta hand it to her. That chica is smart.

Gabriela Vergara in Univision’s Desperate Housewives

So, Univision’s own version of Desperate Housewives is coming to a television screen near us? Who shall be playing Nicolette Sheridan’s character? None other than Venezuelan actress Gabriela Vergara! This is definitely good news. Great news actually. I so miss seeing Gabriela act. I’ve been enamoured with her ever since seeing her as Barbara Montesino in “La Mujer en el Espejo”. All I can say is, wow, what a great actress. Some people think that her role as Jennifer de la Vega in “La Hija de Jardiniero” is her best ever. I differ. All I can say is Desperate Housewives en Espanol is definitely off to a good start. Bring it on, Gabby. PS: Not sure about how I feel about the other castings: Ana Serradilla will take on Eva Longoria. Not a bad choice. Scarlet Ortiz taking up Teri Hatcher’s role? What a miscast. Where was Susanna Gonzalez? Couldn’t they have tracked her down for this. Que barbaridad.

[photo: Getty Images]

Pitbull to get his own Reality Show

Looks like Armando “Pitbull Mr. Miami 305″ Perez is balling these days. The Latino cable network Mun2 will be giving him his own reality series La Esquina (“The Corner”) and that’s in addition to his sketch show Rock, Pepe, Scissors, set to debut in a few months. He’s the perfect choice for the reality series. He is one of the few Hispanic rappers besides Fat Joe and the late Big Pun who has credibility with the mainstream hip-hop (Pitbull has collaborated with Little Jon)—in addition to his leverage with Latinos. His next album, a sort of sequel to 2006’s El Mariel, is called–(no surprise) The Boatlift. The first single “Secret Admirer” featuring Lloyd is already drawing some buzz. The album drops November 27th from TVT Records.

Love in the Time of Cholera in Theaters

The film version of famed Columbian novelist Gabriel Garcia Marquez’s book Love in the Time of Cholera is in theaters. The film stars Benjamin Bratt, veteran Latina actress Fernanda Montenegro, and artsy Latino film staple Hector Elizondo. So far, the film is getting mixed reviews. London’s Globe and Mail writes that the film “knits together the book’s crucial plot turns without accessing its soul.” But what do critics expect? Anyone trying to make a filmmable screenplay out of a 50-year spanning collection of love letters is bound to come across issues.

Comedian Marilyn Martinez Dies

 

Comedian Marilyn Martinez died of colon cancer. She was 52. Condolences to her husband John David Crowder.

So, who was she? I sure didn’t know until I read her obituary in The New York Times. Turns out, she was quite a character, a trail-blazer too. She made appearances in Pauly Shore is Dead, My Wife and Kids and even on the SiTv reality show Urban Jungle. What was most interesting about her, however, was that she was a comedienne with sass. She was part of a Latina troupe called Hot and Spciy Mamitas and was also a member of the Hot Tamales with future Desperate Housewives star Eva Longoria. Her style was very avant-garde, especially for a Latina. Discussing her riske comedian routine, comedian Carlos Mencia told the Associated Press “She was getting away with saying a lot of crazy stuff. It wasn’t like ‘I’m a woman and let’s talk about flowers and shopping’ But she could do clean if you wanted her to.”  She will rest in peace.

Ricky Martin to Hispanics: Speak English but…

Associated Press writer Alex Veiga reported that backstage at the Latin Grammy Awards, Ricky Mar had a message for Hispanics.  After urging them to learn English, he added: “Music breaks borders, unites cultures. … We have to speak Spanish. We can’t stop speaking our language. I would not like to think that a new generation of Latinos in this country can’t speak their language.” Well said, Ricky Mar.

 [Photo Credit: AP Photo/Mark J. Terrill]

Juan Luis Guerra Dominates Latin Grammys

Daddy Yankee, Orishas and Ivy Queen lost to Puerto Rican Calle 13 for the Latin Grammy for Best Urban Music Album for  “Residente o Visitante.”

Juan Luis Guerra and his banda 440 won, not one, not two, but a total of five awards at the 8th Annual  edition of the Latin Grammys. The Dominican star’s laurels included trophies for Record, Song, and Album of the Year, Best Merengue Song, Best Tropical Song, Person of the Year. Other winners for the night included Ricky Martin (Pop Vocal Album and Long Form Video), Jesse and Joy (Best New Artist), Juan Luis Ricky Martin told the press: “Guerra is … the father of Latin American poetry and whoever thinks the contrary, well, get off the bus”. He can talk. He won two trophies. Wonder if he would still have kind words to say, if like Alejandro Sanz, he had  to go home empty-handed.

[photo credit:  AP Photo/Jae C. Hong) 

Paulina Rubio Tests Positive for Marijuana

All I gotta say is, Ooh, Paulinita…

 Mexican pop diva Paulina Rubio and her husband Nicolas Vallejo-Nagera went to the Mexican consulate to apply for U.S. residency and as part of procedure had to take drug tests.  Test results showed that Paulinita and Nicolas  are, well, are one doped-out couple. Paulina tested positive for marijuana while Nicolas’s results revealed the same in addition to  ecstasy and cocaine. Dios mio! Benny Ibarra, Paulina’s former bandmate in Timbiriche, came to her defense. Birds of a feather, flock together and usually defend each other, it seems.

JLo’s Pregnancy Confession (Finalmente)

Following the lead of ChrissyAgui who recently confessed her own pregnancy, Yeni Lopez finally fessed up to being preggo. Last night during the Miami Stop of her El Cantante Tour with husband Marc Antony the singer-actress tattletold, “. “Marc and I are expecting a baby!” The truth will set you free, Yeni.

[Photocredit: WireImage and Rodrigo and Luis Guerra Jr/Jr Ramey via People.com]

Eva Mendes Has Some Advice for Lindsey, Britney and Paris

In the October issue of Gotham magazine, Eva Mendes lets it out about a couple of things, but in particularly a couple of wild childs (yes, it’s an intentional disregard for proper plural noun setting). Without naming any names, Ms. Mendes said:

“You know [who they are]—pick up Us Weekly and they’re there. I feel bad for these girls. I don’t look down on them. I think they’re in a really hard situation. It’s out of control. I look at them with sympathetic eyes because I just can’t imagine how it is to deal with that.”

Selena Gomez Representin’ Latina Teens

This post has moved to http://hissip.com/selena-gomez-representin-latina-pre-teens

Mariah Carey’s Lack of a Love Life

In a recent interview, Mariah Carey made several interesting observations about her love life. Asked if she believes in such a thing as sustainable love, the former wife of Señor Tommy Mottola told Glamour contributing writer Carole Radziwill: “With a human being I don’t know. But definitely with a pet. I don’t think I’ve experienced a realtionship of the caliber I writer about in my love songs. There are songs I’ve written about certain people that it’s obvious I felt, ‘Wow, this is the real thing, this person definitely has to be for me.’ And it didn’t turn out that way. The Butterfly album is full of them.” I guess “certain people” here means Luis Miguel and Derek Jeeter. Comadre, comadre…don’t give up on love. It will come in time. Or at least, that’s what I keep on telling myself too.

[photo credit: Shots Daily]

Christina Aguilera: Er, Um, Yeah, I’m Pregnant

ChrissyAgui finally admitted she’s preggers. The 26-year old mama-to-be made the revelation in the upcoming issue of Glamour magazine. ChrissyAgui made it quite clear that she plans on being on good mother…not the kind who drives with the child on her lap…and without a seatbelt. She told the magazine: “I want to get it right”. Senor y Senora Bratman will have their delivery sometime in April.

[Photo Credit: Reuters]

Carlos Santana’s Divorce

Dios mio! Carlos Santana is divorcing, after a whopping 34 years. At least they made it past the silver anniversary. His wife Deborah served him with divorce papers, or rather filed divorce papers in Marin County, California. It’s the whole adage, the straw that broke the camel’s back. After years of putting with Mr. Santana’s ego-tripping, cheating, she just couldn’t take it no more. The couple has three kids from the three-decade union. Carlosito, whatever young poca cosa(s), you’ve cheated on her with, she (the poca cosa(s)) will cheat on you too eventually.

Record Label: Jennifer Lopez is a Primadonna

As much as we try to keep the Yeni posts to a minimum, this chica keeps popping up. She’s on our radar now because of her high-maintainance regimen. She’s reportedly making her record label Epic Records spend more money on her, than they’re making from her albums. Rumors are, they’re planning to drop her! Consider these, compradres and comadres:

 Last Album Cover: $60,000 (in hair and makeup, lighting, photog, etc)

 Music Video Budget:  $300,000

Sales of latest album Brave? 53,000 copies. 

Epic apparently forgot the days when the On the Six and J.Lo albums were making money for their pockets. You’re only as good as your last album (sigh).

Rosie Perez Discovered Yeni. yokay?

What’s all the fuss all about? After telling Michael Musto in an interview in Out Magazine that she’s responsible for discovering Jennifer Lopez, dancer-choreographer Rosie Perez was met with a lot of rolling ojos.  Perez told the magazine that she insisted that a chubby checker Lopez come on board as a dancer on the 1990s sketch show In Living Color—despite the fact that Keenan Ivory Wayans, the producer of In Living Color objected.

 Credit should be given where credit is due. Ms. Perez, while not responsible for making Jennifer Lopez a star, was definitely instrumental in the making of Yeni.